Lets just catch up on a few things.
J went to the dentist on Tuesday - kicking a screaming. He was so nervous that after the x-rays the doctor deemed him "jumpy" and told him to come back at time when they can give him laughing gas first. This is only for a routine cleaning and I am sure that my insurance will not pay for that too. Also, they found out in his x-rays that his wisdom teeth are impacted and he has to get them out. 25 years old and still need to get his wisdom teeth out... I think the insurance guys are just watching the money roll in from us. I KNOW this will not be completely covered. And I dragged him there... Out of love I told him that he really needs to go to the dentist when he would have been happier never going. And now, I have to pay for all of this work. I mean, we don't really have to get it done (he never would have on his own) but now I feel obligated. Damn.
I will know the results of my MRI on the 7th when I meet with the doctor and figure out if they can fix it any better than it is now. I might be looking at another bout of surgery and casts and things like that! Yeah! I just want it fixed and am pretty much willing to do anything to be able to move it like I was pre-fire. I hate the scars that I have and the constant pain that is a reminder of everything bad. I hate constant reminders.
Looks like we are going to go ahead with the plan of James working part time and keeping the kids home. I am not sure it will accomplish anything since I don't always find him to be the best influence on the kids. He coddles Mike and yells at Jon... He says Jon is older and should understand better and Mike is just a baby. But trust me .. Mike understand. Really understands and is a tricky little kid. Can James potty train Jon? Can he keep them fed and happy and teach them numbers and colors? Will the house stay even remotely clean? He says it will allow him more time to clean while I remember days of him getting nothing accomplished because "he was watching the kids." I guess it is worth it for the money huh? Is the money worth more than having a competent day care provider that is state certified to take care of my kids? Is the stay at home parent thing a better answer? How the fuck should I know. I know that this could be temporary but I am afraid of losing my daycare lady if we need to go back to outside care. I might end up having to pay even more if that happens. Hmm.
Work is work. I have decided to think of it only as my way to get through school. Maybe if my financial aid comes in really strong I will try and work part time only. But my goal is going to be to finish school. My job is not leading anywhere higher than I am - only more money over each year - but nothing spectacular It is a job that pays me money and that is about it - I identify with my job and I enjoy it somewhat but it is no longer my driving force. No matter what - this job is not going to get me where I want to be. Only school and some more hard work will.
Love life? No comment.
Friends? I think things are getting better though some days I think that they are worse. I talked to Jen ( my displaced D.C. buddy ) for like two hours last night. I miss Jen. She was always and still is always a strong voice of reason (except for her own issues :-) ) but most of us are like that. I know that she loves D.C. And everything - I just miss her. I think that we would have a lot of fun if she was here to hang out with. I also caught up with Monica ( my lost buddy) and we got to catch up on things. She is going back to school also - except hers is for a law degree... Dang lawyers. I think that the "war of the roses" that has been going on here is Madison is close to ending... I could be all hippy-like and say ...
Can't we all just get along?
But I won't. I just wish everyone would play nice together and get over it. We are still all friends and still all close. We can party together or game together or just hang out. But is should be without some sort of hanging resentment or bad vibes. Right?
I am spending Saturday home - cleaning and reorganizing. Yuck. Hopefully I will be out with some friends on Saturday night. Sunday is anime day with Chris and then Mage: Dark Ages. Busy weekend with nothing grand to do I guess.
All for now.
-tech